Copyright © 2000 LeeAnn Heringer
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Copyright © 2000 LeeAnn Heringer
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the personal assistant to the gods of ones and zeroswe've spent two months searching for an internet god who could think so long and deep he would leave small router fires in his wake and instead we found rick, or richard, it was never made clear what he wanted to be called. but oracles have a reputation of mumbling and if he wasn't an internet god we were convinced he was a close personal advisor and may actually have been in the room with them which was close enough. after letting him interview us 1 day a week for 2 months, we made him an offer more money than the ceo and as much stock as me, one of the founders, but he came back with some papers. his brother-in-law, the divorce lawyer, had drawn up some terms of separation and exile guaranteeing rick would still get the money if he didn't like us and left. so we spent more money and time to have our lawyers talk to his lawyer when rick came back with a story of how he'd earned a 6 week paid sabbatical 3 years ago and never taken it which was somehow our fault so he wanted a $20,000 check up front. we offered instead a 3 week paid vacation before he started but he demanded the cash and we finally said no. he's still circling us with the squawk of a lost parrot demanding more money. in fact, he's coming back in again today but we've cut the wick to save the lamp and sent our headhunter scouts back out into the desert with a tatter of dirty silk so they'll know what to look for in the flags over the tents of the internet gods. |
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